Houkou no mokuren

I have been going through a lot recently, physically, mentally and emotionally, and on my path I have found myself thinking more and more of my beginnings, of my homeland and most of all, those left behind. February 7th is the anniversary of my mother's death, and I have never actually done anything to commemorate it aside from visiting her grave when I still lived in Japan. I feel like I have wronged her by doing this, and I feel ashamed... she was a beautiful and loving, though fragile woman, and was a light in the darkness of my young life. So... this is for her, a memoir to her grace, beauty and the ever-present smell of magnolias that followed her like a silken veil.